To answer these question, I surveyed roughly 25 men and 25 women ages to get their viewpoints. As a result of our consistent rejections by “older” women, we don’t like dating older women. We’ve been conditioned to be afraid, therefore we stay away. Yes, men are immature, but only because women let us be immature. Being a goofball is the path of least resistance.
Hopefully she will understand where you’re coming from. If she is still insisting on moving in with this man, unfortunately there’s not much https://datingmentor.net/ you can do, but at least you’ve made your concerns known. She will learn eventually when the relationship comes crashing down on her.
Because those cologne-wearing, Dolce-upgraded, French-press-drinking, 30-something hunks are a whole different animal. Significant age gap who was alive two decades before she was born. Available for editorial and personal use only. Women’s fertility naturally begins with him to going solo again.
And then you just feel really, really really creepy. I encountered this a lot talking about music and television. We reaaaaally encountered his age when talking Saturday morning cartoons. He is not necessarily a bad person, but I would be wary that when you get too “old” he’ll try to find someone younger. There’s nothing wrong with feeling it out and seeing how it goes, but you’re still in a state of intense change, so you may find that you grow apart from him while he remains stagnant in the long run. Someone your own age might be more likely to change and grow with you (but that’s not guaranteed either).
I’d experienced a lot of things, and knew who I was. I wouldn’t have a problem if my kid, at that stage, dated someone older. But if they didn’t know who they were yet, I’d be leery of someone wanting to “shape” them. What this exercise highlights is that men in their fifties, like men of any age, defy categorization, and this especially holds regarding what they’re looking for in a woman. Clearly, personal life experience, role models, values, and just plain character significantly impact any individual man’s relationship goals, no matter his age.
Check Megan’s Law, check criminal records, check everything and anything to find out about this guy. If your mom wont protect her kids from a potential predator then you have to help. Make sure your brothers know to tell you if ANYTHING fishy is going on. Sorry, but your story has nothing to do with LW´s one, the age difference is a lot bigger, they haven´t known each other as long, the age difference between BF and kids is a lot smaller . That being said, one major difficulty of having a large difference in age is making sure the morals, values, and life goals of both people are synced. Do you both respect each other’s careers?
After a while, men become inured to a woman’s dismissal, which ironically makes them more attractive because of an added level of confidence, that leads to better dialogue and approachability. By the time you’re in your 30s, you’re able to buy a comfortable car and a property to call your own provided you’ve been saving and working since college. It doesn’t mean you have to buy these things, but just knowing the fact that you can provides a 35 year old man a wealth of confidence.
Don’t fuck it up by making a rookie mistake like telling a 31-year-old you smoke pot every day. As much of our generation is delaying activities like marriage and procreating, we are, in effect, also prolonging its adolescence. Without those weightier responsibilities, Millennial boys (or, for the most part, the ones I’ve encountered) are living this suspended fratboy mentality. Before agreeing to a set-up, as a follow-up response or even playing a flirtatious game, I always find the answer to the question, “So, how old are you? And if you don’t know who the Seavers are from “Growing Pains,” then you don’t stand a chance.
A close friend of ours married a man 10 years younger then herself while being a single Mom to two boys 5 & 8. That was 22 years ago and he was a wonderful pseudo Dad and a great husband. They have a good marriage and a happy home looking forward to grandchildren. So don’t be too quick to judge anyone you haven’t meet yet. Her mom seems to grudgingly approve which is good evidence that the relationship is healthy. If a 46 year old man got together with a 22 year old woman a few eyebrows would raise but most of us would give them a thumbs up.
And Sarah is right on – predators look for weak women. Women who won’t stand up for themselves, who have poor judgment, who’ve been abused and mistreated before. And pedophiles look for children whose parents are vigilant enough or intelligent enough to properly protect them.
It is not fair to a kid, even if I’m wrong about this guy’s intentions. I don’t think we have enough details to make strong recommendations here, and I definitely think it’s a little extreme to say “he must be a pedophile! I don’t think it’s wise for the mother to move in with her new boyfriend after months, but as others have said, the mother is a grown woman. All the LW can do is find out all the details from her mother and express her concerns. I think it’s fine to let her brother know that he can lean on her, but she should be careful how she talks about it, because going to him and saying “Call me right away if he looks at you funny! ” is going to be confusing and might make it even more difficult for the new boyfriend to establish a relationship with him.